We cannot Say that We didn't See

I can’t judge someone who decides to use substances to feel better, because I almost crossed the line myself. Since that experience, I have never taken any other drug. I drink alcohol, one glass a year, because I’m not looking for a nirvana sensation. I like to feel all my emotions, so I can control them better. And if I ever need a reminder, I just need to look around me. They’re not everywhere, but even in the nicest areas, we see them from time to time, talking to themselves or lying on the ground. In certain areas, there are dozens of them, sometimes even more. The walking dead. Some are bent over, with a strange posture, giving off a strong smell. I feel pity for them, because it takes strength to say never again. And we don’t know what kind of trauma they’re trying to fix, forget, or explain. But don’t get me wrong: trauma or not, I will never accept the impact this condition can have on society and on families. During my short addiction, I was only hurting myself. But if I had kept going, I would surely have hurt the people I love. I would have taken a hospital bed from someone who never asked anyone for anything. I would have bothered families by begging, when all they wanted was to enjoy a walk. I would have exhausted social workers. Maybe I would have stolen, or, like the girl in that book, maybe I would have sold my body. Or maybe a bad encounter, or being in the wrong place at the wrong time, would have made me hurt someone who never asked for anything. I don’t know if I was truly an addict, because I used for less than ten days. But I can’t say I didn’t know, as if I had never seen anything.