Chapter 1
Where I was in my life
Set the scene. What was your life like then?
As a woman, I'll say it, and I'll sign it: we women are our own worst enemies. Jealousy starts very early between us. A mother can be jealous of her daughter; two sisters can be jealous of each other. At work, the female world is enough to make you cry. From my point of view, women are much crueler than men, because when they do it, they enjoy it, and they do it strategically and cruelly. I understood this from a very young age, but it was when I entered the working world, and then became a mother, that I really felt the relentlessness of my peers. Before I got pregnant, people asked me, without any shame, when I was going to get pregnant, especially since I had been in a relationship for a while. When I got pregnant, I received opinions on everything, with advice that said one thing and its opposite. But above all, I wasn't allowed to complain. I couldn't say that being pregnant made me sick, depressed, and worried. Maybe it was payback because before having my baby, I was the type of woman who got upset when I heard a mom on the bus, the train, or a plane with her baby, especially when the little one decided to cry the whole trip. I wasn't allowed to say that I was exhausted, that breastfeeding was really painful, and that I struggled with my mood, especially after giving birth. I was happy to be a mother, but at the same time, I was sad, because now the baby was outside of me. I wanted this baby only for me, but at the same time, I needed the baby's daddy to take over so I could relax. I couldn't drink coffee or tea; I couldn't eat food that could give the baby colic. For a while, I stopped listening to other women about how I was supposed to feel, what to eat, and what to wear. Maybe I was too exhausted to question myself.